i am so uncreative

Winter break, so far.

Wed, 13 Dec 2006 02:15:01 GMT

My computer is totally fucked. I can't afford to fix it right now so I'm waiting a while. Kalu just laughed and said he'd never seen anything like it before and that I was fucked. That's cool. I didn't really want it anyway.

I went to the high school today. Everyone identified me as "Maria's sister." That was weird; it's never happened before. Creepy.

What if I don't get my job back in the summer? What will I do? Ugh why am I already stressed out about something half a year away? Oh right, it's me.

I bought Ashton this really nice down comforter for X-mas. Well, it's part of his gift. He's not here right now so I already put it on his bed and it looks great and it feels great and I can't wait for him to get home and see it.

We went bowling last night with everyone and I sucked. Two of the worst games of my life! Ugh.

This is all I guess.

The Beginning of the End

Tue, 05 Dec 2006 02:31:33 GMT

Shannon and I shared a special moment earlier. Yes, that's right. We synchronized our clocks and met at the crosswalk at 5:33. It was below freezing outside so we were attempting to minimize our outside time. And we were perfect. We didn't have to slow down a step. We couldn't have been more prefect. It was amazing and very special.

In other news, the finals are half over. I now have two days off before the first in-class final. So I'm taking the night off and just watching tv. It's great. Also, if anyone's up for a late night Grille visit this week, let me know. It'll be great.

HP Fanatic

Sun, 03 Dec 2006 21:58:53 GMT

Emily and I have been watching Harry Potter movies all day on ABC Family. At the end of each commercial break they show another Behind-the-Scenes clip from the 5th movie! It's absolutely amazing. We've been talking about HP all weekend and we've discovered so many great things about the last book. Anyway, back to my real life.

I've read two books in the past 26 or so hours. So now I'm taking a break and after dinner I'll write my Anthro essay. Then one final will be over! Soc won't be hard since it's another take-home essay (and Pass-Fail). So soon two. Updates as I finish.

I love my dinosaur icon. I took this picture at a museum in Paris. Yep, there's a dinosaur lurking in the bushes (trees) outside a Parisian musee.

I want to travel again. I also want to go home. Ironic, huh?

I stlil can't sleep. Last night I lay in bed until 4 am. It's getting worse and I can't do anything about it. I'm going to try to go to bed early tonight. Sleeping pills might help.

Quittin' Time

Sat, 02 Dec 2006 18:48:11 GMT

I've done all of fifteen minutes of work today and I'm ready to quit. I wonder how much of this book I really have to read to write this paper. The sad part is that I really expected my final to be over this book but I still didn't read it when it was assigned. But I procrastinate. Especially in this class. Speaking of procrastinating with something regarding Phyllis, I still need to email her to officiall say I am interested in her trip next January. I've realized that if I really want to do this trip money's going to be tight for me for the next year and a half. I think that's something I can live with. How many other opportunities will I have to hike the Amazon and climb the Andes? Sometimes I wish that other people were as supportive of my decisions as I want them to be. But I guess if that were true I wouldn't really understand my own thoughts as well or some crap like that.

How quickly can six days pass? I hope quick enough. I need to get away from here for a while. The sooner break starts and I can leave Danville the saner I'll be come January.

I guess I should quit procrastinating and read this book. If anyone's ever read The Body Silent and wants to save me some time, give me a ring. I'll be here all day.

Sat, 02 Dec 2006 00:43:08 GMT

Wow. Sometimes you say things and people just take them completely the wrong way. It's as if they're trying to pick out the worst I could mean, knowing full well that's not what I'm saying. I'm glad people know me.

Fri, 01 Dec 2006 03:59:17 GMT

Today's rant: The Cafe. Know what I hate? I hate that to get a cup of coffee I have to wait in line behind 4 or 5 people who want blended drinks. Oh my God... I just want a cup. Can't I go in front of you? Getting a cup of coffee shouldn't take 15 minutes. Jazzman's needs an "Express Lane." Let me swipe my card, pick up a cup, and be on my way. That is all.

Tomorrow is the last day this year that I have to wake up at a certain time.

Thu, 30 Nov 2006 23:27:03 GMT

Sometimes I wish the people close to me were more enthusiastic when I am enthusiastic.

Wed, 29 Nov 2006 22:11:28 GMT

I am very tired of getting spam in my school inbox. Who did Centre sell our email addresses to for us to have a million junk emails in the past month? The one I just received begins, "Even as a child, I would draw pictures of foxes and fantasize about being one..." What kind of weird (and maybe kinky?) email is this? I refuse to read any further.

I just wrote my sociology paper that's due tomorrow. I spent an hour on it and refuse even to use spell-check, determined to get some use out of this pass-fail status. My English class ended today, Anthro ends tomorrow, and Soc and History end Friday. Thank God for the end of the semester.

Tonight's night two of the One Act Play Festival. And tomorrow is the last night. Once again I will have attended each night and seen every play. I should get a special thanks. I have significantly fewer friends right before drama productions. It's okay. I got all my work finished. This paper I just wrote is the last thing until finals. Woot!

It's going to be hard to get back in the swing of writing every day. I'm already out of things to say and I repeated alot from yesterday. Sorry.

Wed, 29 Nov 2006 05:44:02 GMT

So I've been told that writing for 20 minutes a day is theraputic, so it looks like I'm going to have to make an effort to write more entries. I figure this way I'm saving memory on my computer. I know, cheap reason, but what can you do?

As the semester winds down I'm feeling calmer than every before and it's actually unsettling. I have a paper due in two days that I haven't started, and I don't really care. When you're taking a class pass-fail and your grade in it is better than most of your other classes, you tend to stop trying completely. That's the only thing left for this week. Finals don't look too ominous for the first time ever. I have two take-homes for easy subjects, one test for which the essay question has been given to me already, and another one that really doesn't count for too much. I'm pretty relaxed, I guess.

I know that the warmer weather has been helping me out lately, too. It's nice to wake up for class and not dread going outside because of the cold. That's made my mood better the past few days. Also, today I got a really nice compliment. A friend told me that an acquaintance of ours told her (I know it seems confusing) that I was really smart. This person thought that my comments in class were very interesting and original and they thought I was a generally intelligent person. That definitely made my day. I think that it impresses me more that he found it important enough to bring up in conversation, but I guess at the same time it's a little weird. I mean, my friend just admitted that she and a guy I know from class were talking about me. Flattering, but weird nonetheless.

In our Notesworthy email today it said that Thursday Centre's announcing something very exciting about the 2008 Presidential Campaign Debate. I mean, when you say it like that you don't leave much to the imagination. I wish I were still going to be here; it would be a really fun environment to watch. News people are funny.

In other news, I'm now attempting to be less of a controling, anxiety-ridden person... in theory, anyway. I've made a lot of changes this month. I wish it were January. Then I could say that I fulfilled a New Year's Resolution. I guess I'll have to get creative this year.

Thu, 16 Nov 2006 00:12:19 GMT

Know how much my week's sucked? This is my second attempt at posting. My first one froze and went away. Even technology is turning against me. What. The. Fuck.

Sun, 12 Nov 2006 22:29:32 GMT

So I went to the library earlier to get some more work done. I know, it's incredible that I've done so much in the past few days. Two more days of hardcore mode and then I can just coast through the end of the semester.

I would like to take this opportunity to discuss some library ettiquite with you all. As most of you know, I've had a hellacious few days full of waking up early to study and continuing until midnight (even on a Saturday). So in order to complete yet another paper today, I decided to journey to the library to read.

Why do people go to the library? Well it's a decently lit, moderately cool place with few distractions and a couple comfy chairs. Some people have the false idea that it's quiet, but did you see that on my list? NO! This is because the library is in fact the breeding ground of the Centre gossip mill. Sure, Cowan is great for catching up on the latest slander, but the library is so much better; you can bitch about and put down whoever you want without the fear of their walking up behind you. Sundays are prime gossip mill time after such a wild and crazy weekend. And this is why I hate the library.

I found an unoccupied table and set up camp. As soon as I was "in the zone", these two sorority girls walked up and sat at a table just behind me. Fine, I can't claim the entire left wing of the library for myself. But these two girls began talking. I don't mean the quiet whispering we're all guilty of. These girls were using thier outside voices. So, being the passive aggressive Melanie that I am, I gave them a few glares without really knowing how effective they were (I was not wearing contacts or glasses). On my last turn-around-and-glare move, I received a rude "What?" from the girls. Last straw.

So of course I left the library and forfeited my wing to the gossipy sorority girls. Fine. I'll work in my room. But it's not like there arne't a million other places on campus these girls could go to. The Warehouse, Cafe, and all dorm lobbies are open on Sundays. Go to the Hub. Get DPS to let you into Olin. I mean, if you want to talk in the library, fine. Get a study room. Some people go to the library because they need a quiet place to study. Surely by now we are all old enough that we should have been taught proper library ettiquite by now. In first grade I believe most of us were taken by our teachers to our elementary school library and told that in this particular place, quiet was a law. Aren't there signs that say "SShhhh!"?

So I ask that the next time you are in the library, remember back to what you learned in first grade. Surely as Centre students we are all smart enough to realize that there are other people in the world, and even the library.

Wed, 08 Nov 2006 01:09:08 GMT

Here is a funny Dave Barry article about golf.

Pro golf: A game of non-stop boredom
BY DAVE BARRY
(This classic Dave Barry column was originally published April 16, 1995.)
It's a gloriously sunny day in Miami, and I'm standing in a semicircle of maybe 500 people on a carpet of lush, sweet-smelling, green-glinting grass, the kind that makes you want to get naked and roll around on your back like a dog.
But the people around me are not doing that. They're silent and solemn, like a church congregation, except that a lot of them are smoking cigars. They're staring intently at some tiny figures way off in the distance. I'm staring, too, but I can't quite make out what the figures are doing. Suddenly the crowd murmurs, and 500 heads jerk skyward in unison. I still can't see anything. The crowd holds its breath, waiting, waiting, and then suddenly ... PLOP ... a little white ball falls from the sky, lands in the middle of the semicircle and starts rolling. Immediately the crowd members are shouting at it angrily.
''Bite!'' they shout, spewing saliva and cigar flecks. ''BITE!!'' This is how they tell the ball they want it to stop rolling.
The ball, apparently fearing for its life, stops. The crowd members applaud and cheer wildly. They're acting as though the arrival of this ball is the highlight of their lives.
Which maybe it is. These are, after all, golf fans. And this ball was personally hit by -- prepare to experience a heart seizure -- JACK NICKLAUS.
This exciting moment in sports occurred at the Doral-Ryder Open golf tournament, an event on the professional golf tour, wherein the top golfers from all over the world gather together to see who can take the longest amount of time to actually hit the ball.
I don't know about you, but when I play golf -- which I have done a total of three times in my life -- I don't waste a lot of time. I just grab a club, stride briskly to the ball, take a hearty swing, then check to see if the ball has moved from its original location. If it hasn't, I take another hearty swing, repeating this process as necessary until the ball is gone, which is my cue to get out another ball, because I know from harsh experience that I will never in a million years find the first one. I keep this up until there are no balls left, which is my cue to locate the part of the golfing facility where they sell beer. In other words, I play an exciting, nonstop-action brand of golf that would be ideal for spectators, except that most of them would be killed within minutes.
Your professional golfer, on the other hand, does not even THINK about hitting a ball until he has conducted a complete geological and meteorological survey of the situation-circling the ball warily, as though it were a terrorist device, checking it out from every possible angle, squatting and squinting, checking the wind, taking soil samples, analyzing satellite photographs, testing the area for traces of O.J. Simpson's DNA, etc. Your professional golfer takes longer to line up a six-foot putt than the Toyota corporation takes to turn raw iron ore into a Corolla.
I know that it may sound boring to watch grown men squat for minutes on end, but when you see a pro tournament in person -- when you're actually watching these world-class golfers line up their shots -- it is, in fact, UNBELIEVABLY boring. At least it was for me. I would rank it, as a spectator sport, with transmission repair.
''HIT THE BALL, ALREADY!'' is what I wanted to shout at Jack Nicklaus, but I did not, because the crowd would have turned on me, and my lifeless body would have been found later buried in a sand trap, covered with cigar burns, because these fans worship the golfers, and they seem to be truly fascinated by the squatting and squinting process.
The more time that passed with virtually nothing happening, the more excited the golf fans became, until finally, when Jack got ready to take the extreme step of actually hitting the ball, everybody was nearly crazy with anticipation, although nobody was making a peep, because putting is an extremely difficult and highly technical activity that -- unlike, for example, brain surgery -- must be performed in absolute silence.
And so, amid an atmosphere of tension comparable to that of a Space Shuttle launch, Jack finally bent over the ball, drew back his putter and gently tapped the ball.
''GET IN THE HOLE!'' the crowd screamed at the ball. ``GET IN THE HOLE!''
The ball, of course, did not go in the hole. Your world-class golfers miss a surprising number of short putts. Too much squatting, if you ask me.
''NO!'' shouted the crowd, when the ball stopped, maybe an inch from the hole.
Some men seemed to be near tears; some were cursing openly. These people were FURIOUS at the ball. They did not blame Jack. Jack worked HARD to line up this putt, and here this idiot ball LET HIM DOWN.
But Jack was magnanimous. He tapped the ball in, and the fans applauded wildly, as well they should have, because it is not every day that you see a person cause a little ball to roll six feet.
When Jack had acknowledged the applause, the next famous world-class golfer in his group, John Daly, began considering the many, many complex factors involved in his putt, which he will probably be ready to attempt no later than June. Let me know if he makes it. I'll be in the grass just beyond the refreshment area, rolling around like a dog.
Anyway, life is fine. I got all the classes I wanted for spring. I'm having a career crisis, though.

Centre C

Sun, 08 Oct 2006 23:04:23 GMT

Taking a semester off from the Centre campus/ bubble really does a number on one. I figured that coming back to campus would be this amazing reunion, but in all reality, I feel like I don't know this place. Everything is weird. I don't know anyone, I don't do anything, I don't know what's going on. All I do is sit and wonder what happened to the people I knew, what happened to the things we used to do, what happened? All I do anymore is homework, sleep, and watch tv. I keep saying that when golf is over I'll have more time to go out and do things, but I know that I won't. It just doesn't feel the same. I don't know what's happened. I mean, this is college; I should be going out and having fun, right? But Centre feels weird. The people feel different, distant. Maybe I'm imagining it. Maybe this really is Centre C. Maybe it always has been.

Wed, 04 Oct 2006 00:13:10 GMT

I am sick again. Yup. And Ashton's coming to visit tomorrow. What's with this always being sick before I see him?!?!

I have two tests tomorrow. Back to back.
I need to do laundry tonight.
My room is a mess.
I want to watch TV.
I'm on lots of drugs. Some make me dizzy.
I would like a shower, too.

Tue, 03 Oct 2006 01:06:18 GMT

We have a Light Brite in our room now. Life is good.

Thu, 28 Sep 2006 19:32:21 GMT

Yes, I still have a livejournal. No, I don't write in it often. It's hard to keep up with things during golf. I'm sorry. People I like who are in other countries: I will try to read and reply to your posts more often.

Other than that life is pretty good right now. Emily and I are watching a movie, I was reading a magazine and doinga crossword and she is cross-stitching something. It's better than studying.

I've lost my livejournal writing abilities.

Oh, how the time flies.

Mon, 21 Aug 2006 17:26:20 GMT

I'm not sure how it's already a week before classes start. This is crazy. What happened to the summer?? There are so many things I need to do before I can even think about coming back to campus. My car is falling apart and I won't have time to fix it. That sucks. I have a cavity that hurts, so I'm about to call the dentist and see if he can squeeze me in sometime this week. I have little things to finish up, too, and let's not forget the whole packing thing. I still haven't sufficiently unpacked from France, but packing for school seems a bit more ominous right now. Seriously, packing and unpacking are two of my least favorite things ever. I'm sick of working and babysitting, but I still have four days of work left and one day of babysitting. There is so much to do that I'd better stop bitching about all the stuff and go out and start doing it.

Wed, 16 Aug 2006 17:49:57 GMT

I haven't been keeping up with this thing very well. I haven't kept up with much of anything lately. I've just been exhausted for the most part.

I have been working so much I feel like something's wrong on my days off because I'm not at the pool. Of course, my days off are spent babysitting my cousin's 18 month old son. So on my days off I have to be at her house at 7:30 am. One good thing about when school starts is that I will get to sleep in 4 days a week. Too bad for that 8:00 MWF.

There was so much I wanted to do this summer that I never got around to doing. I fully intended to read about 3 times the number of books I did read. I wanted to see more people, do more with the ones I rarely see. I really did intend to play more golf, but then when it came down to it, I just didn't want to at all. I meant to spend less money than I did. I meant to be more productive. Basically all I did was make my work ethic less effective than it was before, and right in time for the second half of college to start.

I'm not sure how this semester is going to go for me. I mean, taking 3 110 classes could go either way. And I'll be that weird junior who's in all the freshman classes. Yay for me. Melissa is supposed to be in my only other class (which is only a 230 class and my only class for my major... I don't know how my advisor agreed to this), but she wants to switch out. I'm not going to know anyone in any of my classes, but whatever. And Mary Bess isn't going to be on campus this fall. I'm not sure how this semester is going to shape up. Fortunately I'll have a good roommate, even if I do drive her crazy with planning before we even get to school. It's going to be hard going back to campus after being in France, but I'm looking forward to it, too. Maybe a good change is in order. However, I'll try to make more trips back to Bowling Green this year.

Well, it's 1:00, I have to be at work in two hours, I have errands to run and need to fix lunch. So, until soon...

Mon, 24 Jul 2006 07:17:16 GMT

So I'm slightly concerned. I just checked my golf schedule against the academic schedule, and it seems that I probably won't get a fall break this year. I don't get a centre term break, I don't get spring break, and now I probably won't get fall break. See, the Monday and Tuesday after fall break is our last tournament, so chances are pretty good that Coach is going to want us all on campus. So there goes the only break I actually got to enjoy.

Housesitting is over for good. It's going to be weird being home for a month straight.

I'll get several hours of overtime this week. That's exciting.

I got to tell a man off at the swim meet Saturday. He wouldn't leave the team area, so I went to ask him to leave and he said, "Honey, Sweetie, this is public property. I can sit wherever I want." Yes, an adult said that. But I said, "Sir, I'm sorry to tell you this, but you're on private property. This is a private club. And as an employee I am asking you to move." He said, "When I got here this deck was covered with little red berries and I went down and got a broom and swept it off. It should have been clean when we got here." So I said, "First of all it stormed last night. Second, no one asked you to sweep off the deck. And no one asked you to go into our tool room. Move." He didn't move at all until a male guard came and told him that if he didn't move he was calling the cops. Once Trevor got there the guy was more cooperative. More than the guy being an ass, it bothered me that he listened to a guy and not me. I'm a forceful person when I want to be. I'd be afraid of me.

Update... finally

Mon, 10 Jul 2006 22:35:45 GMT

So I realize that I don't get to update this journal very often, but blame it on my lack of internet access at my house-sitting locations this summer. Fortunately I am only two days away from completing this job; my cousin comes home Wednesday. But before you celebrate my good fortune, let me catch you up on all that has happened while I've been staying in the house that hates me.

- I have killed the power... 4 times.
- I have electrocuted myself. It seriously hurts.
- I have come home to blaring fire alarms. 7 firefighters and a big truck came to visit me.
- Somehow the hot water has quit working.
- I have killed two plants.
- I came home one night to realize that the table on the back deck was knocked over and broken.
- The bird was almost eaten by the cat.

Anyway, two days and I will no longer be responsible for these things.

In other news, Phil gave me some really sweet Japanese shoes that I can't remember the name of, but I'm excited about them. I really don't know when I'll get to wear them, but they're authentic, being hand-me-downs from his grandmother I think. They're sort of difficult to walk in and they're really small, but that just makes them more awesome. Maybe Phil will read this and tell me what they're called. Or maybe Mary Bess will know.

Tue, 20 Jun 2006 18:37:49 GMT

From today until Sunday I'm house-sitting at two different places. I don't know how this is going to work yet.

I guess that's all.

Sun, 18 Jun 2006 19:23:32 GMT

I finally got a new screen name. It's balivernes23, so spread the word.

That is all.

Fri, 16 Jun 2006 17:52:55 GMT

House-sitting is starting to get old. I want to stay in one place, but not necessarily my house. You'd think that I'd be used to moving around and never spending more than 4 nights in the same place, but it still bothers me. I think I expected to stay in one place when I came back to KY. Of course, I didn't think I would have this many jobs house-sitting in one summer.

I've felt weird lately in another way, too. I keep realizing that I'm homesick for Strasbourg. Today I picked up some sandwiches from Riley's Bakery and took them downtown to the Square. Mom came out of her office and we ate lunch together in the park. Oddly enough, the park reminded me of a park we visited in Antibes on the Mediterranean Sea. It's strange how Bowling Green and Southern France can look so similar, but I guess a park is a park. Strangely enough, I felt comfortable there. I felt like I fit in better in France than I ever have here. I know that I'll go back to France within 10 years. Hopefully within 5. And I can't wait till MB goes to France. When she comes back she will understand how I feel.

Other than that BG has been good to me. As much as I miss it there, I'll still admit that it's good to be home. Just how long it can stay good is still debatable.

I'm stupid.

Wed, 31 May 2006 04:45:02 GMT

At work today I walked into the Guard room barefoot. I slid on some water and stubbed my toe on a wooden crate thing. It hurt. I found out a few minutes later that I knocked my toenail most of the way off. Yeah...

And apparently I'm just one of the guys. Apparently.

Woah...

Tue, 30 May 2006 18:09:47 GMT

So I just found out how to have multiple user pics. This one is a dinosaur museum in Paris. I didn't get to go inside, but I did enjoy the large T-Rex hiding in the trees outside the museum.

Dave Linsalata doesn't think dinosaurs existed. How stupid.